40% of Goal

I have finally reached 40%, I didn't think I'd ever make it, but finally on Sunday I reached it. September has not been a good month for working out. But I keep telling myself the longer it takes to reach maintenance weight the better habits and lessons I'm learning, and hopefully it means the longer I'll keep the weight off. hopefully permanently.

In other news, I had a CT Scan last week because of a pain in my side I've now had for over 2 years. AFter multiple ultrasounds with my OB/GYN, thinking it was a cyst - and they never showed anything - my OB/GYN sent me to my normal doctor. I didn't go, and didn't go, and finally a cuople weeks back when the pain came again I was so sick of it I called and made an appointment. He ordered a CT Scan, and guess what it showed, an ovarian cyst. Don't know why the ultrasounds never showed it. But anyway, now I wait to hear back from the OB/GYN after she reviews the scan and then I guess I find out what we do next. The thing I'm scared of is they'll do nothing and even though the pain has lessened over the last year, I'll be dealing with the coming and going pain 2 more years from now.

Oh well, the doctor's know best I guess.

So 40% took longer then 30%, but 50% I'm afraid will even take longer. The closer I get to my goal weight the longer it'll take to lose the weight. But this I accept.

Moderation

Sometimes for me being moderate when I have a goal is extremely difficult. Its either all or nothing. I'm learning this round of weight loss, that moderation is a key to me. I have to be willing to give myself a day off when I need it, or a week off when I'm sick, and not beat myself up over it. If I constantly beat myself up, then I get discouraged and quit, or I what happened last time, I got to my goal then went completely off the exercise regimine and eventually gained all the weight back. So I'm striving to learn moderation. Its a difficult thing for me. But this morning, although I feel guilty now, I woke up and just couldn't work out. So I didn't. I knew, even though I had two weeks off recently from the morning workouts, I just needed this morning off. So I took it. Now I feel guilty, but I'm trying hard not to.

I'm also being more moderate in my eating habits, I allow myself foods I really like, like an occassional hamburger, I even had a huge piece of Cherry pie at my mother-in-laws. I'm hoping that by finding the key to moderation will be the key to permanent weight loss.

I promised pictures. So here I was back in late May (the pink shirt). I think this was around Memorial Day weekend. It was about 8 pounds into my weight loss (I think). This is the most recent picture I have. This was approximately August 15th. So its a month old. I've lost about 5 or 6 pounds since then. With our trip and other factors we haven't taken any posed weight loss pictures sine then, but this weekend we should on our bike ride tomorrow.

Tomorrow the goal is over 45 miles. We'll see if we accomplish it, the weather is supposed to be nice though, high of only 75. And considering I'm now under 200 (barely but I'm there), it should be doable.

Bike Riding with a Head Cold

Saturday, even though I was still fighting the end of my head cold, we went on a really nice bike ride from Alton, Illinois to Pere Marquette State Park. It was 40.88 miles round trip. I was exhausted when I was done but really proud of myself too for the following reasons:

1. I had a head cold, its hard to bike ride with a head cold.
2. 16 miles of the 40 were on a highway, there was a wide bike lane, but it was still nervewracking as motorist speed was 55 (I think)
3. 10 miles was up and down pretty steep hills and windy curvy paths through the woods. While absolutely gorgeous it was quite difficult physically.

We will do this ride again, but probably not until next year when my skills are higher as a biker and I'm more confident on roadway situations.

We packed snacks in our gear for the ride dried apricots, beef jerky, a power bar each, and a granola bar each. Powerade (zero calorie) and water were also staples. I don't have any pictures of the ride because I felt horrible and was really grouchy on the way back when we normally would have stopped for pictures.

Also learned to always wear clothing with stretch in it. I busted out the inner seams on both legs from the hilly section and my muscles bulking up, so if you passed a woman flashing her thighs on Highway 100 in Illinois Saturday, yep that was me.

Nick also entertained me by telling me how my calves were looking quite dimply and he figured that mean I was burning fat on them. Which I hope is right because I really want to wear tall boots some day.

I will be posting more pictures on here soon as I've decided to close my facebook account and share my shrinking pictures on this blog. It seems like a better idea. We haven't taken any new pictures in a couple of weeks though, so this weekend we definitely have to take one.

This weekend we are hoping to do at least a 45 mile ride, and quite possibly a 50. The weather is supposed to be nice, and hopefully I'll be over my cold for good. The following weekend will only be short rides as Nick's on call.

Getting healthy has been made easier by finding a sport I really like.

I'm at the very edge of being under 200 pounds. I am so close I can taste it. Who knows maybe tomorrow.

New Focus

I've decided that I need to change the focus of this blog. Instead of being about the decisions that have made me overweight and the new decisions which are making me healthy, I'm going to focus on daily choices I make to become healthy. This could be along a lot of different avenues. How we cook a meal, how exercise fits into the grand scheme of things, etc.

I think its important now to start concentrating on positive things instead of negative, because positive in the end will get me to where I want to be.

So here it goes.

Part of the things that have helped me lose to date 36 pounds is eating much healthier. Less butter, less fat, etc. And the thing is they haven't been drastic changes. We have definitely eaten a lot healthier, eaten out less, added more whole grains and vegetables to our diet. But a lot of the changes I think that have effected us the most have been the small changes or the frequency of eating some of our favorite foods. And the great thing is our diet has had so many new things added and variety that we don't miss eating our favorite things every week.

One change is not cooking with as much oil or butter. Each morning after I work out I have an egg for protein. It helps me get through the morning a bit better then just having yogurt and fruit. But I do not cook the egg with anything. I use a non-stick pan and cook the egg completely dry. It still tastes fine and I've added no calories.

So as we refocus this blog to positive changes I will also try and share some photos. I love to take pictures, I just haven't been as sure about sharing them. BUt you know a blog without pictures is just boring.

So here's a picture from our longest bike ride, 45 miles on the Katy Trail. It was a gorgeous day as you can see.

Bike riding is a huge reason I've been able to conquer the weight beast this time. I really enjoy riding with my husband. It provides us a nice time to talk and be healthy together. I think we've found our joint hobby for life.

Wow nearly a month has past

I haven't posted in forever. I'm not sure why, well that isn't true. I've been busy, and honestly just haven't felt like writing. I've been spending time on Facebook, it kind of reminds me of quick blogging withouth much thought. I've been playing around on Facebook now for about 2 months, and I have mixed emotions about it. I like it, but then I don't like it. I like aspects, but don't like others. So I need to devise a plan as to how I'm going to deal with it personally. Lately I've been making a lot of plans as to how I'm going to deal with things personally because I'm not handling things very well. I'm somewhat irrational, moody, anxious, and I keep catching colds! my body is going through a lot of changes, and my doc is trying out a new birth control to see if that prevents cysts from growing, but I think its making me much moodier and irrational. And in case its not that, we'll just blame that.

I'm still doing well on weight loss. So far I'm 36.5 pounds reduced. I have a very long way to go, but I'm positive I will make it. Again, if you'd like to see pictures of the shrinking you'll need to befriend me on Facebook for the time being. Eventually I'll post pictures on here. Maybe. I'm not sure I'm going to keep up this blog, in fact I'm seriously thinking about deleting it. I wrote what I needed to write to get on this healthy path, and now that I'm on it, I don't know that I need this avenue.

Its still a thought in process. I will still have my knitting blog, even though I update that even less frequently then here. Although winter months are coming so knitting time will increase in the evenings when we can't ride our bikes after dark. Thus more interesting things to blog about.

The truth is, I just don't have that much to say. And I need to quit thinking about my relationships with people and just be.